Submitted by Nino and Scotty Too Hotty...
Sunday, February 26, 2006
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Who's your daddy...
I once again got in touch with my neo-punk roots last night taking in a NoFX concert at Jannus Landing. And yes, me and my 38 year old boss/friend were the oldest ones there.
Half way through the show...and this is no lie...I got hit on. I attribute it to my new updated Lance Bass haircut.
She pulled the old, "I think I know you, you look very familiar." For fun, I played along as gave her my smoothest response. "Nope, don't think so."
"Where do you live," she querried.
I shot back with the moxie of 007, "Clearwater. Maybe you've seen me at the Super Target, I go there a lot."
Her response, "Nope, I don't go there. Where do you go to school?" Cue tires-screaching sound effects and my sarcastic chuckle.
"I don't go to school. I have healthcare and a car payment."
But is is good to know that I have now been approached by 100% more women as a 24 year old than all three years of high school.
Half way through the show...and this is no lie...I got hit on. I attribute it to my new updated Lance Bass haircut.
She pulled the old, "I think I know you, you look very familiar." For fun, I played along as gave her my smoothest response. "Nope, don't think so."
"Where do you live," she querried.
I shot back with the moxie of 007, "Clearwater. Maybe you've seen me at the Super Target, I go there a lot."
Her response, "Nope, I don't go there. Where do you go to school?" Cue tires-screaching sound effects and my sarcastic chuckle.
"I don't go to school. I have healthcare and a car payment."
But is is good to know that I have now been approached by 100% more women as a 24 year old than all three years of high school.
Thursday, February 16, 2006
Dick Cheney Memorial Scattershot
-Why is snowboarding an olympic sport? And why would you let people call you "The Flying Tomato?"
-I received a letter in the mail today from a "Mr. M. Burns." No lie. It was eeeeexcellent.
-I had a newspaper reporter ask me for a pen today because "he forgot his." A reporter. There are only two things you need to be a reporter...paper and a pen. You wake up, you grab two things and you're set. Paper-check, Pen-check...and you're set for the day. Imbecile.
-I received a letter in the mail today from a "Mr. M. Burns." No lie. It was eeeeexcellent.
-I had a newspaper reporter ask me for a pen today because "he forgot his." A reporter. There are only two things you need to be a reporter...paper and a pen. You wake up, you grab two things and you're set. Paper-check, Pen-check...and you're set for the day. Imbecile.
Saturday, February 11, 2006
The Pit turns 100
With this post, The Pit reaches the century mark and is now eligible for syndication...Free malts and a lap dance from Valerie for everyone who stops by and says congrats to Nat. Everyone's invited, even the Chang-Rodriguez wedding party and the random white guy who snuck in the photo.On a more serious note --- Ask a Ninja...and if you own a video iPod, download his podcast. 
A grown man who thinks he can accurately toss a chinese star, believes he's skilled in nunchucking and says and does dumbass things...reminds me of someone, but I can't quite put my finger on it...
I guarantee this guy owns a Bowflex.
A grown man who thinks he can accurately toss a chinese star, believes he's skilled in nunchucking and says and does dumbass things...reminds me of someone, but I can't quite put my finger on it...I guarantee this guy owns a Bowflex.
Thursday, February 09, 2006
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits tonight...
I am hereby boycotting CBS. I don't need you or your Crime Scene Insolants.
In the words of the wise Walter Sobcek: "I told that fuck down at the league office-- who's in charge of scheduling?"
They up and cancelled 'Love Monkey' today, the only show I enjoy watching on tv these days (other than Scrubs, The Office and Project Runway), not to mention, I'm in the damn show.
It was an insurmountable montage of the guy formerly known as Ed, a former teen heart throb, the once sex-kitten in Mind of a Married Man and Kitty from Arrested Development (woohoo Spring Break!). How is it possible a show once touted as a male Sex and the City can't stay on the air but fuckin Kristin Cavalleri can?
That show really brought the room together...
In the words of the wise Walter Sobcek: "I told that fuck down at the league office-- who's in charge of scheduling?"
They up and cancelled 'Love Monkey' today, the only show I enjoy watching on tv these days (other than Scrubs, The Office and Project Runway), not to mention, I'm in the damn show.It was an insurmountable montage of the guy formerly known as Ed, a former teen heart throb, the once sex-kitten in Mind of a Married Man and Kitty from Arrested Development (woohoo Spring Break!). How is it possible a show once touted as a male Sex and the City can't stay on the air but fuckin Kristin Cavalleri can?
That show really brought the room together...
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Monday, February 06, 2006
Slideshow Bob...
Submitted by Slick Rick. Notice that if you are an NFL quarterback chicks still give it up even if you get wasted and spill liquor all over your shirt causing you to remove it and wear a soaked undershirt at the club.
Friday, February 03, 2006
It's questionnable...
New intern started today. I'll be blunt, I can't figure out if he's gay or not.
Exhibit 1-He wears a long sleeved button-down shirt with the top THREE buttons undone and a form-fitting, ribbed black tank-top underneath.
Exhibit 2-He was doing a project that required gluing something onto a piece of paper and asked if we had another glue stick because his had run out. I hand it to him and he says, "Oh good, a big one. I like big glue sticks." I couldn't figure out if he was kidding or not.
Exhibit 3-He drinks Pepsi...all the time. I haven't seen him without a can in his hand yet.
Exhibit 4-He told me within the first 2 hours he was in the office that he had downloaded a porn movie to his iPod and the quality was awesome. But he whispered porn. He also says 'F' instead fuck, yet he says the word shit.
Not that there's anything wrong with that...
Exhibit 1-He wears a long sleeved button-down shirt with the top THREE buttons undone and a form-fitting, ribbed black tank-top underneath.
Exhibit 2-He was doing a project that required gluing something onto a piece of paper and asked if we had another glue stick because his had run out. I hand it to him and he says, "Oh good, a big one. I like big glue sticks." I couldn't figure out if he was kidding or not.
Exhibit 3-He drinks Pepsi...all the time. I haven't seen him without a can in his hand yet.
Exhibit 4-He told me within the first 2 hours he was in the office that he had downloaded a porn movie to his iPod and the quality was awesome. But he whispered porn. He also says 'F' instead fuck, yet he says the word shit.
Not that there's anything wrong with that...
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