Why I should be 94

I thought it was a good idea at the time. AAA, free convention, vacation giveaway...what more could you ask for? The Fi and I trekked over to the IP on Sunday and mingled with a gaggle of retires at the local AAA Vacation Extravaganza in search of honeymoon ideas. It was much like the time Ben and Sandra pretended they were buying a condo in Florida and traveled with the retires in Forces of Nature (Sidenote-I find this to be a delightful flick). It could go down as one of my top 10 worse decisions as we both ended up being the youngest ones there, about 40 years off the average attendance age and way too passive. Besides the wave of blue hair and nasty, nasty, cranky old farts, I left with no free vacation and I smelled like Ben Gay but in true form to my heritage I got about 10 FREE books covering cruises, train rides, horseback trails, spas, carribean islands, etc. In conclusion, there are about 300 20-somethings in the Bay area who are getting jack shit for an inheritance because g-ma and pops want to see the Aztec ruins by mandarin gondola and stay at the Ritz Carlton.

We have three problems: 1) I travel 6 months out of the year, why do it any more than you have to?, 2) There's not enough sedative for The Fi to fly, or boat, over an ocean, 3) We're both inherently lazy. So we are in search of how to celebrate marital bliss without traveling far, traveling on water, getting bored or spending an ass-load of money.